New Kid on the Block

[Hardball]

You might want to try alternating hot and cold if you haven't already. The idea is to increase blood flow into the area with the application of hot and decrease it with the application of cold. I'd probably do lukewarm instead of hot for your injury, start with lukewarm for 4 minutes and then 1 minute cold, alternating 8 times, always starting with hot and ending with cold. This probably sounds crazy but you can even just wear wet socks, put them on right before bed (with a pair of thick wool socks over them), it'll improve blood flow into and out of your feet and therefore throughout your whole body (and the wool socks will kee your feet warm and allow them to breath so by morning the cotton socks are dry).

I wouldn't recommend aspirin because it's a cox inhibitor and specifically it inhibits cox 1, which is involved in membrane repair and immune function, but it also inhibits cos 2 and 3, which are inflammatory, and, uh... inflammation is a necessary part of the healing process, believe it or not.

Anyways, this is just what I learned from a naturopath and some of my own research and what's worked for me and my clients, but of course check with your doc.

You've got mail!!

[treelizard]

You've got mail!!

Healing happens!!

[treelizard]

Personally, I like the roughness, but if I think I am being unfairly singled out I would probably give those folks a little extra attention. It simply may be they are testing you. Either meet their challenge or talk to the instructors about the problem. Otherwise you’re in for a rough time.

This probably deserves to be a whole thread of its own, but it's definitely something I have trouble with...trying to figure out the balance of wanting to train with a lot of resistance and do techniques "for real" instead of going through the motions, and not wanting to get injured in class.

As a woman who usu. ends up training with all men, I feel like I have to spend a lot of time proving that I'm not really delicate and it's okay to go hard, that a) unless they do the techniques properly, I'm not going to just give it to 'em and b) if someone accidentally, say, lightly taps me because I'm not blocking properly, then it's my fault AND I'm not going to run home crying or anything, so they can stop with the excessive apologies and asking me if I'm okay.

On the other hand, I'm not interested in getting seriously injured, and this class dynamic makes me incredibly hesitant to bring things up when they come up. Like for example, I was working sweeps about a month ago and two of the guys I train with were pretty much doing kicks instead of sweeps. I wasn't going down because their angle was wrong, but when I told them they weren't doing the technique correctly, they just kicked harder, basically. Now I don't know about anybody else, but getting kicked fairly hard over and over in the same spot isn't my idea of a fun time, AND I don't think it was necessary for the technique at all (i.e. you can do a sweep without really brutal kicks). BUT I feel like if I said something, it would only reinforce their idea that I am this fragile, delicate girl that they have to go really really easy on.

I was thinking maybe I was just being whiney, but I really am the type of person that will ask people to add more resistance while sparring or trying out techniques because I want to make sure they really work and also because it's more fun (and because then I can test out new dit da formulas when I get home, lol), but if a technique doesn't require a lot of force to work is it really gonna help me or my training partner's game for me to have to put up with a lot of unnecessary pain in non-sparring situations?

Interested in honest feedback... Tell me I'm being really stupid and whiny if that's what you think!

[Hardball]

What were the Belt ranks involved?

[treelizard]

Uh... it's not one of those groups with belts.

But I'd say the two guys I mentioned are the most senior students and are REALLY good, so I forget sometimes that they've been training for under a year. Both of them have really improved my game by letting me know when I'm not using enough force or angling correctly, and both of them are really technically proficient and have a lot of heart.

It's funny that these two seem a bit insecure about their ability when they're both such studs. lol The rest of us who suck (uh, I mean, are newer) aren't insecure at all. Well, except people being insecure that if they lightly tap me during class I'll start bawling, and me being insecure about the fact that people think I'm so fragile, etc. etc. You know, typical male/female dynamics!

[treelizard]

Just wanted to add one more thing--I suppose I should mention that these guys wanted ME to kick them hard in the same spot over and over again... LOL. BUT I'm not sure how wise it is to measure myself using an alpha male stick, lol.

What I ended up doing was when the instructor came over to our small group I just said, "Hey, why don't you try it out on him, I wanna see the angle." Which I did. Heh. Our technique was wrong.

[Hardball]

Let me think this over before I try to respond. I wanna give an intelligent response.

[Hikage]

my $.02

feedback?

I think we have all at some time or another dealt with some kind of problem in class. I had one guy who used to show up drunk pretty regularly. We've had some 'slow' people who think they they have to fight everyone in the room because that's just what you do. I've also dealt with the ego crap, which I hate the absolute most.

In regards to your specific situation, I have a scar between my shoulder blades because someone couldn't get this one stick technique right; he's a 2nd degree. I offer this because I don't really see someone as being a senior student if they have been around for a while. I understand that you mean the school is relatively young. If you view them as the senior students, then you are placing trust in people who are still learning the basics, as are you. While they can still teach, to some extent, I would be wary about allowing your mind to view them as having any kind of extra say-so around the class soley because they've been around for a year.

Furthermore, I think its in how you approach the situation. Your initial reaction was right on. You told them that they were doing the technique incorrectly and offered some assistance. When they did it harder, (and this happens a lot, you'd be suprised), I stand up and say with a smile, "Now come on, you only did the same thing harder. What the heck is that?" Then you re-show them. I've been in the arts for a while, but I still have occaisons were white belts will point out a simple mistake to me. I can't imagine that good-willed people (such as them) would take offense to you offering suggestions.

I wouldn't worry about having them think you're wimpy. On instance of "hey, BACKOFF!" isn't going to change them overall. Really, how many times have you told a man not to leave the toilet seat up and he still does it? It takes a while for things to sink in. What is really going to prove your non-wimpiness is your daily way of handling situations. Yes, you are right. You are going to have to work harder than the next man. You are going to have to hit harder and work with a higher intensity. Once you start cracking people you'll hear statements like "dang girl! You can hit." That's when you say "You'll get your chance to give it back, be patient." This opens the door to it.

To be honest though, I offer this thought. It is not that most men are afraid of hitting you, it is the fact that they cannot get over the idea that they are in this close to a woman and they are not more intimate. When a man is in close to a woman, he likes to be soft and charming. It's not that he's afraid of hurting you because we don't hurt women, he's afraid of ruining his chances. <i>Regardless</i> of how far fetched you think this is, (guys back me up on this, be honest) you are going to have to get men over this. When a guy touches a girl, or vice versa, there is always the "chance" or the thought that runs through his head and it affects how he is going to react to you.

My suggestion is this: do not do anything to perpetuate this thought. Be aware of any flirting, however small, and I would play the dork. Lose any kind of sense of humor and I woulnd't talk about your boyfriend, because that tells guys that you are interested in men. When you're in class, I would talk only about class. If they are really martial artists, they will be motivated by an upbeat and focused martial arts training partner.

I could go on for hours...

-Hikage

[Hikage]

HB -- Don't take that crap

Hardball,

You are a black belt. People expect a certain level of perfection from you. You and every other black belt out there is put under a microscope. You will see people watch you just to see you make a mistake so they can say "see, he's not that goood." When a new black belt shows up in a class, or when someone is promoted to shodan, there is this time period of testing from the other students. They want to know if you have really earned your rank. This happens out of jealousy and also because you are now an instructor and they want to see if they can respect what you are teaching.

Here's the short of it. There is a standing rule in my school. Don't mess with the black belts; they will kill you. When I first started out, I was working with a 10th dan (No joke. I regularly train under a 10th dan who's "friends" stop by unannounced.") This 10th was not my instructor, but is the soke of a sister art. He wanted to play a little, and thought I would get something out of having him beat on me so he had me throw some punches at him and he then took me down.

After a little, he said "You can block." So I did. Apparently his definition and my definition of blocking are different. I blocked and pulled both of his hands down. Well, he didn't like this. I found out later that he thought I was actually going to attack him. He threw me into the next room, backed me up against a wall and held me by my larynx. He screamed manically at me for a little, threw me back into the first room and had me throw full force at him. In perfect control, never hitting me above the shoulders, but very painfully, he very thoroughly established that he was the man and that he wasn't going to tolerate that. Long story short, he admitted later that he misinterpreted what I was doing and I was probably too inexperienced to be put into that situation.

Here's the point... I learned not to screw with him or other black belts. There comes a point in time that you need to lay the smack down on people. You waited too long. Don't wait until your turn if you are being challenged or disrespected. After the first time, say to him "Back off or you and I are going to have problems." Second time, when he moves in to kick you, drop the bone of your forearm down and crack the top of his shin as he is stricking you. "I told you not to do that." I

hate to be brutal, as it isn't my style. You're being tested and you need to get a 100% in order for him to respect you as a black belt. You can expect this crap to happen. Get used to it. I have not had a new student in class who hasn't put me through some paces at one point or another and in some level of intensity or another. Some people are really obvious when it's happening, others are more subtle. Most will do it by trying to counter my technique. You just have to simply counter their counter and make it painful.

Don't take their crap -- because it is and leads to disrespect.

-Hikage

[treelizard]

Thanks, Hikage. I do admit I think it seems far-fetched since everyone I train is married with children and/or grandchildren, but you're right, I bet this all started when I was talking in class about how hot Randy Coutore is for his age. Someone said, "Gross!" and they quickly changed the subject.

I've found that punching someone really hard five or six times gets them over their hesitation to hit a woman, for that round anyway.

[Hardball]

Hardball,

You are a black belt. People expect a certain level of perfection from you. You and every other black belt out there is put under a microscope. You will see people watch you just to see you make a mistake so they can say "see, he's not that goood." When a new black belt shows up in a class, or when someone is promoted to shodan, there is this time period of testing from the other students. They want to know if you have really earned your rank. This happens out of jealousy and also because you are now an instructor and they want to see if they can respect what you are teaching.

Here's the short of it. There is a standing rule in my school. Don't mess with the black belts; they will kill you. When I first started out, I was working with a 10th dan (No joke. I regularly train under a 10th dan who's "friends" stop by unannounced.") This 10th was not my instructor, but is the soke of a sister art. He wanted to play a little, and thought I would get something out of having him beat on me so he had me throw some punches at him and he then took me down.

After a little, he said "You can block." So I did. Apparently his definition and my definition of blocking are different. I blocked and pulled both of his hands down. Well, he didn't like this. I found out later that he thought I was actually going to attack him. He threw me into the next room, backed me up against a wall and held me by my larynx. He screamed manically at me for a little, threw me back into the first room and had me throw full force at him. In perfect control, never hitting me above the shoulders, but very painfully, he very thoroughly established that he was the man and that he wasn't going to tolerate that. Long story short, he admitted later that he misinterpreted what I was doing and I was probably too inexperienced to be put into that situation.

Here's the point... I learned not to screw with him or other black belts. There comes a point in time that you need to lay the smack down on people. You waited too long. Don't wait until your turn if you are being challenged or disrespected. After the first time, say to him "Back off or you and I are going to have problems." Second time, when he moves in to kick you, drop the bone of your forearm down and crack the top of his shin as he is stricking you. "I told you not to do that." I

hate to be brutal, as it isn't my style. You're being tested and you need to get a 100% in order for him to respect you as a black belt. You can expect this crap to happen. Get used to it. I have not had a new student in class who hasn't put me through some paces at one point or another and in some level of intensity or another. Some people are really obvious when it's happening, others are more subtle. Most will do it by trying to counter my technique. You just have to simply counter their counter and make it painful.

Don't take their crap -- because it is and leads to disrespect.

-Hikage

Thanks for the analysis. I really appreciate it. I ended up breaking someones shoulder there. Sure, I got my respect but Now it's Bad Blood and I don't train there anymore. By-the-way, I've been a Black Belt for two years.

[treelizard]

Let me think this over before I try to respond. I wanna give an intelligent response.

Cool!

[Tant01]

I don't expect too much from a black belt to be honest. I have a good idea what a blackbelt in Judo or BJJ can do, I have a good idea what to expect from a TKD blackbelt, Karate BB, etc... Now if he's holding a big gold championship belt for his weight division you can expect a whole other level of performance.

[Hardball]

I don't expect too much from a black belt to be honest. I have a good idea what a blackbelt in Judo or BJJ can do, I have a good idea what to expect from a TKD blackbelt, Karate BB, etc... Now if he's holding a big gold championship belt for his weight division you can expect a whole other level of performance.

Yea, Dana White and the UFC have taught the "Open Minded" that Cross Training is essential. Those that don't cross train will be left behind. This is the 21st century not the 12th century.

[Hikage]

Yea, Dana White and the UFC have taught the "Open Minded" that Cross Training is essential. Those that don't cross train will be left behind. This is the 21st century not the 12th century.

This is where you and I differ. I feel that a quality art presents all sides to the circle. Failure to do so only results in ignorance and dead people.

-Hikage