Can you talk your way out of a rape?

[Danny Flucke]

Clarify your mistaken version of what I stated...?

Thanks, Danny

[treelizard]

I know of PLENTY of stories of people who did NOT resist acts that still "escalated" into assault or sexual assault, so I'm still not convinced that it was the women fighting back that would "escalate" it in every situation.

One would think that "chase instinct" would be triggered by running, not by fighting back. In any case, I'd be interested in reading more about it if you have any references! I am constantly reading books on WSD and esp. on success stories.

One of my own self-defense stories involved someone trying to take me somewhere, and I said, 'Whatever you're going to do, you're going to have to do right here, because I'm not getting in your car." I definitely put up a fight, but I wasn't trained, but the guy basically said, "you ain't worth it, bitch" and I got away with just minor injuries. So I've heard a lot of people say, "You shouldn't ever fight back because it'll just escalate things" but I don't buy that... The situation will dictate.

It's pretty odd, because they'll tell you that the other guy has a weapon and if you fight back, he'll kill you, but in the next breath they'll tell you not to use a weapon of your own, because it'll get taken away from you and used against you. Oooookaaaaayyyyy....

My only point is that sometimes NOT doing anything can "escalate" the situation. And also that while you can of course minimize risk, the perp is still responsible for his actions, not the victim.

I think we're on the same page--sorry if I misinterpreted.

Yael

[Danny Flucke]

...so I'm still not convinced that it was the women fighting back that would "escalate" it in every situation.

I never used the word "every" - Only you have. I quoted the State of California data as 38% for escalation rapes in Orange County.

One would think that "chase instinct" would be triggered by running, not by fighting back.

Incorrect. Although a chase instinct can be the result of someone running - It can also be a weak struggle, crying, an injury, sight of blood - Generally any sign of weakness.

Do not make the mistake of thinking that a strong counter attack may not trigger a chase instinct also - It definetly could.

My only point is that sometimes NOT doing anything can "escalate" the situation.

That's just common sense...

I think we're on the same page--sorry if I misinterpreted.

Apology accepted...

The bottom line is that nobody can train for every possible scenario - From every possible attacker - With every possible weapon - In every possible situation.

The goal should be to determine what the highest probable safety issues are present - And train accordingly - Knowing that you may still encounter "un-trainable" possibilities.

Thanks, Danny

[phenom]

i honestly think ladies that if a guy is serious about rape then no words will stop him this is a mental situation that has taken the turn for worse and speaking is a rational manner well to some degree.There is really no true answer on how to deal with this situation fighting to overcome him could work and could also take its turn for the worst.All i can say is be very aware of your surroundings and people around you and dont forget males are geneticly stronger than women so always try to have some sort of personal protection device on you

[treelizard]

That's just common sense...

One would think, but I've heard story after story of women who didn't fight back--or even run away when there was a clear exit--because they thought that would make it worse. So they did nothing, and it got worse anyway.

When I was in college, after a lot of incidents, we asked the police department to send one of their guys come and give a talk about safety in the community, and the two guys both said the same thing--don't fight back because that'll escalate things. As if just standing there would fix things. Then they said they would fix the street lights, and handed out whistles. Yeah, uh huh.

My opinion is that one should ALWAYS fight back if the BG wants to either tie 'em up or take them to a secondary location. I figure in those two instances, you don't have much to lose...

Still interested in info on this chase instinct thing if you have any book or article titles.

[LoneHusky]

It is common sense but women do think differently than men.

[Britt]

I'm a little late in to the discussion, but my mother sucessfully talked her way out of an abduction (and most probably rape, and possibly murder as well) a little over twenty years ago, when I was a kid. A man put a gun in her face in a mall parking lot and told her to get in her car, and she refused, loudly, angrily, and repeatedly. Apparently, that was the last thing the assailant expected to happen. He eventually settled for her car keys and purse, and they both took off running.

[Danny Flucke]

Stories like that are dangerous -

And rarely end that well...

Thanks, Danny

[Bianca]

I can't speak of all possible situations, but you can talk your way out.
I was in Israel. Late at night on the beach, and two drunk Muslim men approached me. I had a knife in my pocket, and I kept it in my hand the whole time.
Fortunately I did not have to use it.

[Tom Yum]

I can't speak of all possible situations, but you can talk your way out. I was in Israel. Late at night on the beach, and two drunk Muslim men approached me. I had a knife in my pocket, and I kept it in my hand the whole time. Fortunately I did not have to use it.

Are you a man? That would be scary...

[Bianca]

Are you a man? That would be scary...

Do I look like a man?

[Tom Yum]

Do I look like a man?

I don't know, do you....

[treelizard]

Watch out, he's gonna start sending you PMs asking you what you look like.

I don't know, do you....

[Tom Yum]

Watch out, he's gonna start sending you PMs asking you what you look like.

.........

[Bianca]

NO PM yet lol