I was scared to fight back to someone I knew i could beat up

[johnnyada1]

alright kid listen up,
don't be ashamed at your response. A true fighter or martial artists realizes his own mortality and what can happen if things go wrong. That is why you reacted the way you did. Personally i would have told the guy to **** off and then see what he did. But, I am older and have a lot of experience. You reacted fine though. the only mistake you made was letting him have control of your fear. Because of that he will find it easier to victimize another innocent. Just look at it this way. If it happens again, if you don't stand up for yourself you are also enabling him to hurt others. It is your duty to resist evil men to help the general public. If you did fight back and win he would think twice upon aproaching another person. If you lost, he would still think twice next time. If he has a weapon, then hand over the money. that is the only exception

ok that sounds good thanks

[HDL]

So you're an adult? I am an adult as well, but being older does not necessarily mean you have more experience. Though you may not have this intention people will think you are trying to be more superior. I know people sometimes think that of me, but what do they really know about me. Anyway, I'd say a good way to overcome that fear or hesitation is meditating. It might take a while, but it'll reduce your tension, stress, and also better your perspective of things. You can not only avoid problems but also achieve many other things as well for your own satisfaction. Meditate and develop a strong vocabulary. The mind and the verbose are the two strongest weapons you could have.

[kodankan]

So you're an adult? I am an adult as well, but being older does not necessarily mean you have more experience. Though you may not have this intention people will think you are trying to be more superior. I know people sometimes think that of me, but what do they really know about me. Anyway, I'd say a good way to overcome that fear or hesitation is meditating. It might take a while, but it'll reduce your tension, stress, and also better your perspective of things. You can not only avoid problems but also achieve many other things as well for your own satisfaction. Meditate and develop a strong vocabulary. The mind and the verbose are the two strongest weapons you could have.

not trying to be superior,
sorry if i gave that impression. Meditation does work, but in order to overcome fear you must confront it.

[HDL]

You must know the problem as it really is in order to overcome it, so you must confront it. However, how many times in life do people confront the same problems (different situations), yet they still react the same, still have the hesitation, or still have the nerve-racking tension? It's like in school. Many years you face bad people that do things, and yet you are intimidated because of them. You know the problem and have confronted it, but you still get that same feeling that bothers (though I'm not in school; graduated long time ago). I don't know any other ways besides meditating to solve this, but that's what I do.

[seany85]

just take this as experience, if it happens again try not to freeze

[kodankan]

next time jsut act like you are a handi capped child who is lost and drool on him a bit. he might leave you alone.
i mean noone likes being drooled on, right?
I sure dont

[old skool dude]

scared to fight back....

Who knows why you froze up kid.. the brain is a funny thing sometimes. All I can say is what my old instructor used to say
Is anybody hurt?
Is everybody's teeth still in their mouth?
Good! You survived!
Go Home!

[HtTKar]

This happened to me once. I had already been in a lot of fights, but they were always against people I was afraid of. Once when I was about 15 this older guy, who was much larger than I picked a fight with me. But I wasnt afraid of him. and I really was afraid of hurting him. He started throwing punches and I wasn't afraid enought to either fight or flight. I stood there like an idiot.

He broke my nose, busted my eye open, and busted a chip off my eye socket before I knew what was going on. Not to mention a fat lip, and spitting blood out of my mouth.

I ended up having to fight back anyway, and somehow, luckily, dropped the guy.

I walked home and hurt for a month. My eyeball was bleeding, and I had the worst headache of my life. This guy probably woke up and didn't think twice about it.

I really ended up taking a whooping on that one and really lost the fight, and just for not wanting to hurt him. When I went home I was laughed at, and my parents took pictures.

It could have been worse. But I learned some very important life lessons here;

1.) NEVER underestimate your opponent
2.) Never underestimate the situation.
3.) Its better to hurt someone in self-defense than take a real ass-whooping, and possibly lose your life.

I also questioned myself. If the only reason I did not fight back, was bacause I was not afraid of him. What would have happened if he was picking on somebody else? Would I have stuck up for them?

This was when I really began taking Martial Arts seriously as a way to defend myself without hurting others. I could already fight before (I was dirty as hell but it worked), But I wanted to be able to protect myself and others, even when I wasn't truly afraid.

If you are really afraid of hurting others, practice - practice - practice. You will find many ways to calmly put an opponent down without really hurting him.

Dont take it too hard upon yourself. This was a learning experience. Use this life lesson to further grow into a better person.

[TONGPO]

look mate dont beat yaslef up.....Hackney's a tough place, it cost you a quid. Better than being stabbed eh? Next time some one asks ya 'wot ya lookin at?' just shake ya head and keep walking, no faster, no slower, no more swagger no less. Just keep an ear for him bumrushing ya..maybe your problem was he didnt lay a hand on you
Maybe you were scared of starting it. You may well react differently if he actually laid a hand on you, and then you should go at him to hospitalise him, put him down and get the fook outa there/or just get the fook outa there. No shame in that, street fighting (for wotever reason) is for mugs

[shirase]

"I really ended up taking a whooping on that one and really lost the fight, and just for not wanting to hurt him. When I went home I was laughed at, and my parents took pictures. "

Nice Family

[SamuraiGuy]

Coulda taken pictures for court... i know a guy who got beat up once.. he didnt fight back at all.. and his dad took pictures.. cause his dad was a lawyer... and then they got the guy arrested... funny how that works.

[HtTKar]

Everybody takes people to court now. When I was younger, everybody fought. Noone used weapons though. It was a fact of life. People didnt run around suing everybody over anything they could. In the long run, I'm no worse for the experience, it has made me who I am today. In fact most people need a good old fashioned a$$ whooping at least once in their life. Its a very humbling experience.

[TONGPO]

yup! very good points. We used to scrap like we'd play football...no big deal at school. Be mates again after the break.

And it is a very humbling experience ..'specially as an adult

[bksposterchild]

Im only 18 years old and small for my age. This same type of situation happened to me but it was with a former "friend." A few people manipulated him into fighting me. I couldnt find it in my heart to fight this person that I knew for almost 10 years over some nonsense that someone else put in his ear. BUT it is really killing me inside that I backdown from him so now I am planning on fighting him. He doesnt know this but thats the best possible way - the element of surpise. I guarantee you nine times out of ten if you surprise someone they will not know how to react. And I know this for a fact because he surprised me in front of a very large crowd. That not only caused me to freeze but I was also afraid. I know it isnt always right to attack someone but being a man you must defend yourself from anyone that tries to bring harm to you. Right now Im training and praying alot for my situation. And hoping that god will allow me to use my knowledge and skills to best of my ability when I do go into combat.

[Tom Yum]

I know it isnt always right to attack someone but being a man you must defend yourself from anyone that tries to bring harm to you. Right now Im training and praying alot for my situation. And hoping that god will allow me to use my knowledge and skills to best of my ability when I do go into combat.

That's a silly reason to fight. Forgive and forget, ever come across that little tidbit while praying?