Bullies

[Hardball]

Listen up young Blood, we are here to help you. First Off I am 49 years old and go by the name of coach. All that hatred and negativity you have stored up can make you a champion in martial arts. When you feel hatred and anger, it's a good time to practice or hit the heavy bag or practice your kicks or pump iron. Afterwards you will feel a since of relief. It's called turning a negative situation into something positive. You belong in a boxing ring, dojo or some type of martial art or combat sport. Do you have a coach or instructor? Good job on ending that fight with a throw.

[Hardball]

whos young blood?

Stick with the Issues Sir!

[Jeff Liboiron]

I was bullied A LOT throughout elementary school, and high school. This led to me becoming a "bully thrasher." I hated these people with ever fibre of my being, and I can still remember fighting off my first bully in grade 1. After going through maybe 5 bullies, I didn't even wait for them to finish what they had to say anoymore, and just attacked them with everything I had. Almost always this happened outside of the school zone on my way home, so my parents never found out about it, and the school never did either.

The bullying stopped when I was in grade 11. I guess most people knew I was psycho from what they had seen, and just left me alone. I didn't mind. My dealings with criminal violence have been far more stressful.

Bullying is getting a lot worse nowadays. I almost consider it criminal violence. We have kids killing themselves, school shootings, and I remember one story about the victims house being burned down by the bully's family. It's just fucking sad.

[FLMKane]

I was bullied in Junior High (Middle School) but only because people found out I was doing martial arts (TKD).
These guys would walk by me and punch me in the stomach or get in my face and say "You think your tough? come on!", etc...

Over summer vacation between 8th and 9th grade, I was working as a lifeguard at our neighborhood swimming pool and one of the guys, (he actually lived a couple of blocks from me, but never bothered me except at school when he was with his friends) confronted me while I was taking a break and swimming in the pool.

He swam up from behind me and got me in a bear hug and started dunking me under the water, he did it about 10-15 times, I was starting to get scared and finally he let go of me and started laughing at me. One of my friends came over and asked me if I was okay, I said "Yes" and swam to the edge and got out of the pool.

Mind you I was small for my age, I didn't get my growth spurt until after I graduated from High School. I was only 5' 5" and maybe 120 lbs. at the time, I'm 6' 2" 205 now.

So anyway, because I was much smaller than they were they thrived on picking on me. A couple of minutes later I dried off and started to leave the pool to head home. I was stopped by this guy and 2 of his friends outside the gate of the pool and received the usual "Think your tough", etc... taunts.

As I walked away I said something to the effect of "I don't have to be tough to kick your ass.", which I wasn't sure how he/they would react, but I said it anyway.

His two friends start saying "Are you gonna let him talk to you like that??", so he runs up behind me and tackles me and starts hitting me in the back of the head. I ended up just taking it and left laughing with his friends.

I wasn't much of a fighter and didn't like to fight cause I wasn't much on confrontation. The only person I never minded fighting was my older brother, because I knew he would stop when I screamed/cried/begged, but I was afraid to fight anyone else because I thought they would just keep attacking me until I was dead.

Anyway, a couple of months later I was at school and it was still common talk that I got my ass kicked by this guy. So while I was walking down the hallway, this guy and his buddies were coming from the other end towards me. I knew the "Confrontation" was coming and I could feel the lump growing in my throat, I really wanted to duck into the nearest classroom, but for some reason decided to keep walking.

Once I reached them I tried to walk out and around them, but Mark (this was the guys name) skirted one of his friends and slammed me into a locker, started laughing and walked on by.

Then something happened, I don't know how to explain it but it just did. I just attacked him, tackled him and started ponding his head into the tile floor. I must have done it quite a few times because when the teachers pulled me off of him he had a nice gash in the back of his head and blood was everywhere.

Needless to say, I was suspended from school and never got picked on by him or his friends again. I actually ran into one of the guys many years later at a mutual friends party and he was like "Hey, how have you been I haven't seen you in forever, etc..", I was thinking..."I would love to kick your ass!"

Nowadays, I choose to walk away, simply because I am more confident in my abilities and not so concerned with proving myself, although I sometimes feel much smaller than I really am. I know I could hurt someone, just as much as they could hurt me, so I prefer just to avoid trouble. I take out my rage in the ring and in training.

I know how you feel. I was Just like that...except I'm still in high school.I'm just 5"4...but weigh 160 pounds.

The mistake I used to do was the same as your. Wait for the confrontation. I dont do that anymore. If I sense one coming I onsh it on my own terms. Much safer. After I started doing that, surprisingly I stopped doing serious damage. Usually the other dude gets the message after an elbow strike to the throat.

[twtguy]

Listen up young Blood, we are here to help you. First Off I am 49 years old and go by the name of coach. All that hatred and negativity you have stored up can make you a champion in martial arts. When you feel hatred and anger, it's a good time to practice or hit the heavy bag or practice your kicks or pump iron. Afterwards you will feel a since of relief. It's called turning a negative situation into something positive. You belong in a boxing ring, dojo or some type of martial art or combat sport. Do you have a coach or instructor? Good job on ending that fight with a throw.

thats what i call turning a frown upside down

[Lotar-4-Life]

"Bullies" are the ones who are scared.

[Lotar-4-Life]

martial arts havent taught me anything about mentaly dealing with bullies. they only taught me to fight sad to say.

No offense, but whoever is teaching you the martial, is not teaching you the arts and needs enlightenment.

this world fucking sucks. i hate it. ill be glad when i die. im not ready to just yet unless it gets really bad.

This is a terrible thing to hear. This world has a lot of good to offer and it's a shame that this has not been shown to you. Confidence is what comes with the "teachings" of martial arts. Once you have the confidence in knowing that you can deal with a simple altercation physically, then you will have the confidence to simply pass it by as if it wasn't even there. What makes all these dickheads so "strong" anyway? Because they can bench press a lot? YOU my friend have the real strength. You're just not looking in the right place for it. It's not all found in your fist. It's mostly found in the mind. Think about what would happen if you were to simply act as though these bullies didn't exist. They only have power because you give them power.

I don't know if you read at all but if you do, there are a few great books out there that will expand your mind when it comes to dealing with people. For a good start, if I were you, I would go pick up "The 48 Laws of Power" by Robert Green. It's just one of my favorites.

I hope you find the beauty in this life. Sure life sucks sometimes but it's what you do with those situations that makes you a person.

[FLMKane]

No offense, but whoever is teaching you the martial, is not teaching you the arts and needs enlightenment.

Shut...up. Philosophies dont matter when your ass in on the line. And the "art" in martial arts? It does'nt exist. Martial art means the art of fighting, which is not very artistic at all. the "art" lies in the brutality and effectiveness.

[Ghost]

being bullied is generally due to a state of mind that you are in, obviously the bully is in the wrong but the kind of person that gets bullied doesnt stand up for themselves.
People will get bullied for any reason, fat, skinny, glasses too tall, too short etc
But its really how you deal with it. If you dont take any shit then people generally leave you alone.
Its having the confidence to deal with it.
I went to one of the roughest schools in north london and it was no party. I had to front up to 5+ groups of guys knowing id lose but it earnt me respect and i was left alone in time. Now at 31 i really dont take any shit from anyone and i can say i havent really been successfully bullied in my life, though people have tried. Ive just stopped it before it got anywhere.

[Lotar-4-Life]

Shut...up. Philosophies dont matter when your ass in on the line. And the "art" in martial arts? It does'nt exist. Martial art means the art of fighting, which is not very artistic at all. the "art" lies in the brutality and effectiveness.

I disagree. There is an "art" to controlling one's self when faced with a situation where one's "ass is on the line". You always have a choice. I was simply stating that since PlasmaShock felt like he hadn't learned any way to deal with bullies in a "mental" capacity from the person teaching him "martial arts", then that person was doing a disservice to the martial arts community and especially to this individual. That's all. Now it may be that PlasmaShock has not grasped fully what was being taught.

On a side note, the "art" as you put it, doesn't just lie in the brutality and the effectiveness. Is the effect or end result not just as well to simply avoid or walk away from a potential problem? Since I train in Krav Maga (which is not a martial art at all), I know all about the "brutality and effectiveness" of a system that is practical to the street. Probably more practical than fixed forms and kata's which will, in my opinion, not get you very far in a real world fighting situation.

But then, since you just go around telling people to shut up, you probably already knew all this. Go practice some more high kicks... I'm sure it'll do you a world of good when 2 or 3 guys wanna pummel your ass in a bar.

[FLMKane]

Okay Mr Krav Maga dude, its my turn to be surprised. I thought you'd know that MOST martial "arts" dont teach you anything about ACTUAL real life situations. And there is nothing artistic about real combat. As for the art of avoiding confrontation...I think that's more about understanding the situation. Something which a good fighter must have. A part of the art of fighting. But that is not what you sounded like in that post.Sorry to say but you sounded like some "Mr Miyagi" saying "karate is not just a way to fight...it is a way of life".

And dont get pomeled. I'm with the 2 guys DOING the pommeling. And I practice high kicks for show. As stated above, an elbow strike to the throat can work wonders, and is much easier to pull of, and should be given priority over high kicks.


And yes I already knew that stuff.

[Lotar-4-Life]

Okay Mr Krav Maga dude, its my turn to be surprised. I thought you'd know that MOST martial "arts" dont teach you anything about ACTUAL real life situations. And there is nothing artistic about real combat. As for the art of avoiding confrontation...I think that's more about understanding the situation. Something which a good fighter must have. A part of the art of fighting. But that is not what you sounded like in that post.Sorry to say but you sounded like some "Mr Miyagi" saying "karate is not just a way to fight...it is a way of life".

And dont get pomeled. I'm with the 2 guys DOING the pommeling. And I practice high kicks for show. As stated above, an elbow strike to the throat can work wonders, and is much easier to pull of, and should be given priority over high kicks.


And yes I already knew that stuff.

Well I guess you win. Some of us practice for show and need a couple other guys along side to do the pommeling and some of us don't.

[Bullseye]

Ghost,

I found you post about never being bullied very interesting.If you were to teach someone to be like that, how would you go about it? Do you think it has to be an intrinsic aspect of a person's character, or can it be developed?

I don't want to bring up the dreaded "street vs. sport" debate. Again. But would you steer someone towars comabtive athletcs, avaoiding "RBSD" type material; or would it be the contrary with lots of scenario based stuff, roles plays and so on?

[Hardball]

Brain Scans Show Bullies Enjoy Others' Pain
By Kevin McKeever
HealthDay


FRIDAY, Nov. 7 (HealthDay News)—Bullies may actually enjoy the pain they cause others, a new study using brain scans suggests.

The part of the brain associated with reward lights up when an aggressive teen watches a video of someone hurting another person, but not when a non-aggressive youth watches the same clip, according to the University of Chicago study, published in the current Biological Psychology.

"Aggressive adolescents showed a specific and very strong activation of the amygdala and ventral striatum (an area that responds to feeling rewarded) when watching pain inflicted on others, which suggested that they enjoyed watching pain," researcher Jean Decety, a professor in psychology and psychiatry at the University of Chicago, said in a university news release.

"Unlike the control group, the youth with conduct disorder did not activate the area of the brain involved in self-regulation (the medial prefrontal cortex and the temporoparietal junction)."

The study compared eight 16- to 18-year-old boys with an aggressive conduct disorder to a group that didn't show unusual signs of aggression. The boys with the conduct disorder had exhibited disruptive behavior such as starting a fight, using a weapon or stealing after confronting a victim.

All participants underwent functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) while watching videos in which people endured pain accidentally, such as when a heavy bowl was dropped on their hands, and intentionally, such as when a person stepped on another's foot.

More information

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services has more about stopping bullying.

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URL: http://health.msn.com/health-topics/mental-health/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100220085>1=31016

[Tant01]

Should come as no surprise... Ever seen the bully SMILE? Of course they're enjoying it. LOL